The following column was originally published April 9, 2022.

Thanks to breakthroughs in medicine and nutrition in recent years, we are living longer than ever before. But this increase in life expectancy also brings an increase in the number of diseases, injuries and impairments that affect older adults. With this in mind, we at the local Visiting Angels office in Salem have created this series of articles to keep our older population and their families informed and to offer some practical advice for meeting the challenges faced by seniors and those who care for them.

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Dementia is the name for a group of cognitive disorders which can affect a person’s memory, emotions, behavior and their ability to reason. While the risk of developing dementia increases as we grow older – the National Institute on Aging reports that about one-third of those people 85 and older are living with some form of dementia – it is not a forgone conclusion that all older adults will develop it in their lifetimes.

There are many types of dementia, Alzheimer’s disease being the most common form, and it is not uncommon for people to have more than one form of dementia at the same time. The symptoms of dementia differ from person to person, depending on the type of dementia present, but many people living with the disorder experience a disconnect from reality caused by their inability to remember things or reason properly.

These symptoms, which can also include emotional outbursts and behavioral problems, can be difficult for family members and caregivers as their loved one’s confusion leads to an increase in stress levels and feelings of helplessness or frustration, in both the family members and their loved one. However, experts have offered several strategies for dealing with dementia-related behaviors which can help family members work around the confusion and reduce stressful situations.

Among these tips is the suggestion that family members avoid correcting their loved ones whenever possible. Often, correcting a person who believes they are still living in the past or talking about deceased family members whom they believe to be still alive can lead to even greater confusion and feelings of anger and fear. Experts recommend stepping into the loved one’s reality instead of trying to drag them back into ours; keeping the conversation going may help to diffuse the situation.

Similarly, if the person is confused about what day it is, family members should avoid correcting them when it could make an episode of confusion worse.

Sometimes, however, correction is necessary to keep a loved one with dementia safe. In such cases it is best for the caregiver to keep things brief and state the correction as gently as possible. They may try rephrasing their correction as a suggestion rather than a command, such as suggesting a walk outside together rather than ordering their loved one not to go outside alone.

It can often be better to find ways to redirect the person to keep a potentially disruptive situation from getting worse. Family members can offer tasks their loved one might enjoy or ask for help with a project around the home. Asking the person questions about topics they enjoy discussing may also help diffuse a situation. When attempting to redirect unwanted behaviors, it is important to make the person feel safe and in control of their situation.

It is also important that family members and caregivers be aware of what emotions their loved one with dementia might be experiencing. Often, choosing the right words means the difference between reassuring the person that everything is good or causing a tense situation to escalate. Sometimes a hug or holding a loved one’s hand can do more to calm the situation than words can. What is most important is that the caregiver stay calm, even in emotionally charged situations, since their loved one will often pick up on feelings of tension or frustration and react to them.

Caregivers and family members should also take some time to take care of themselves, as well. Finding ways to relax and avoiding burnout can help them stop to think through a dementia-related situation before it escalates.

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Information provided by Visiting Angels, America’s choice in homecare. Visiting Angels’ non-medical homecare services allow people to continue enjoying the independence of their daily routines and familiar surroundings. To set up an appointment for a free in-home consultation, call 330-332-1203.